IPPNW-Students India

My Debt to Terrorism

by Pamela Thompson

The sun is bold as it steals under my door and through gaps in my blinds.
It awakens me first and watches as I race to conquer the day.
The bed I awoke in is refreshed by my touch;
for the benefit I received, an even trade I agree.

The youth begin much slower; fifteen minutes and still they do not stir.
A loud call from within, so fierce that even the sun thinks of retreating.
The children do not fear: they have crossed this path but five times just last week.

The youngest of age comes down wearing a sort;
does not blue go with orange if the jacket is striped?
Not much time to waste soon the tardy bell rings. I call fiercely again:
hurry up, hurry up.

Leaving our base, the sun makes its move; blinding us momentarily, the battle it wins.
Routinely I wave and wish them farewell saddened to think they did not hear.
Back home safe and sound, to the quiet I know and respect.
With a drink of sorts and a full day ahead, I turn on the news to fill up the space.
The picture is tragic, the fire, the smoke. There is talk of death, of anger and of evil.

Did the sun play a trick? Are the children asleep?
Will we wake to find it's raining and our clocks have run late?
Our idol bodies sit in place as the moment is relived;
first hours, then days, weeks, years, lifetimes?

I am a man with compassion; I am a man with a job to do.
Our resolve is great and cowed we will not be.
Yet cowed is where I would like to be in the comfort of my bed.
But I cannot hide there, this I know. For my covers will wear thin and my fear will eventually be exposed.

The price of freedom: I have heard that old tale.
I thought this debt had been paid with interest no heart could bear.
Still the bill has arrived on this solemn day and I must juggle my life to make free of my debt.
I cannot question the how and the when, for soon my children will arrive and our evening will begin.

I think once more how my resolve will be great and my eyes fill with tears for minutes only they stay.
Pride will replace them of our country and our men and my heart will beat onward till terrorism ends.
Make no mistake my resolve is sincere: resolve that I shall see no more death, evil and fear.